Yesterday was surreal. I actually attended, and the cute doctor was helpful and I did a few exams, we even got to talking afterwards and it turns out he's 23, damn son! He asked me about my age and when I told him that I'm turning 23 tomorrow he said he's gonna have to get me a present now, I'm not expecting one, but it did cheer me up. I then went shopping and got myself this tiny bag that I wanted last year that's back in stock, had lunch with friends, got home and studied a little but then went to bed. And then at midnight someone opens my bedroom door then closes it again, it was a little weird. But it turned out to be 5 of my friends surprising me. 2 of them got me cupcakes, then one of them came from her peripheral with her own cake, and then the other one got more and they ended up pushing me Into one of the cakes, which lead to a food fight. It was so spontaneous and I loved it! I was surprised that Ab didn't even text me, while the Ham situation is still debatable, because I know he probably wants me to celebrate on sat to make it to al's birthday today, which I'm not gonna lie upset me when his friend called me to invite me... I can't believe they wanted me to tag along to his birthday even tho we don't speak and on my date. God this group is dumb. I smoked up a little and then saw a text from Al. I hate him but it made me smile. It was the perfect thing to say, especially that I kept complaining to my friends that I want a birthday princess Tiara today so I could wear. Why does he have to be such an asshole, when we could've been happy together? I still believe It's this thing he does where he doesn't like stability and gets bored, also let's not forget that friends always come first to him. When he texted I was pretty high and decided to text him the lyrics to the song in the background of the living room. Perfect timing, I guess. We used to listen to it around dawn when we first met, and I was thinking of him when he texted. For all I know he could be texting coz he feels sorry for me, rather than love. But people need to stop feeling sorry for me, cos I'm gonna be fine eventually. Hopefully I'll study this weekend. And now I'm gonna go to class late, but It's better than not going. :)
6pm
I have to get ready, there's a million things to do and I just keep reading last night's text. I dunno why it makes me feel so harm yet so sad. He texted me a few times afterwards, but there's no point in talking or meeting. I'm proud of myself for being strong and not going out with him today, and he did apologise but it just hurts that people want to chase you down, just to screw things up once they have you. I'm pretty sure there's thing that I could've done better in this relationship, but I don't think I'm victimising myself when I say he fucked up and treated me badly.
Remember , as much as that text was sweet, this was the same person that grabbed your hair, and then discussed your sex life in front of people. Don't forget that and go soft.
23. Better get my shit together.
6pm
I have to get ready, there's a million things to do and I just keep reading last night's text. I dunno why it makes me feel so harm yet so sad. He texted me a few times afterwards, but there's no point in talking or meeting. I'm proud of myself for being strong and not going out with him today, and he did apologise but it just hurts that people want to chase you down, just to screw things up once they have you. I'm pretty sure there's thing that I could've done better in this relationship, but I don't think I'm victimising myself when I say he fucked up and treated me badly.
Remember , as much as that text was sweet, this was the same person that grabbed your hair, and then discussed your sex life in front of people. Don't forget that and go soft.
23. Better get my shit together.
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